A Natural Birth Experience

I’ve received many questions about my natural birth experience story. So I decided to write this post to explain what I did, how I prepared, and tips for any mommas out there considering having a homebirth.

Let me start by saying that a homebirth was not on my agenda. However, when I found out I was pregnant with my second baby, I was curious about hydrotherapy or water birth. I heard that water might have a calming effect on the body and could lower pain during labor. That is how my search for a natural birth experience began.

My first thought was finding a hospital that offered water birth to have an alternative pain management method. But, instead, I found a midwifery clinic that felt godsend. I saw they offered women’s health, prenatal care, home birthing, and water birth options. Immediately I called my husband to tell him, and he mentioned that it was a great idea, considering we were in the middle of a pandemic.

Choosing a Medical Provider

You have the option of searching for an OBGYN, labor and delivery doctor, or midwife, each concentrated in their field of work. In my opinion, a midwife was more attentive to my needs because she is also a woman. A midwife who understands minimal medical interventions and believes in the body’s innate ability to know what to do will help guide you to a beautiful, healthy birth. I learned from my midwife that hospital births and cesareans increased in popularity because of men’s work. In addition, their modern inventions and hospital technology offered a “safer place” to give birth other than at home. However, we all know that there is always a risk, even in a hospital setting.

My advice to all mommas is to look for a medical provider that most aligns with her choices, who will listen to her and make her feel comfortable and powerful–because she is! Women have natural abilities for childbirth so let no one take that power away! The doctor does not always know best, but your body does! So trust in your body’s ability to give birth.

“BIRTH IS THE EPICENTER OF WOMEN’S POWER.”

ANI DIFRANCO

Once you choose your medical provider, they should walk you through every step leading up to labor. My midwife was compassionate and understanding and made me feel at ease at every appointment. She did a home visit at 36 weeks and we went over home birth supplies. She also gave me suggestions for things I may want to purchase separately. Be sure to read this Birth Preparation Guide to get an idea of the supplies needed.

The Big Day

My due date was May 4; however, my daughter decided to make her big debut a week early. We had a hunch she would, but we were hopeful for another May celebration since my husband, son, and I are all May babies. But no, she decided to be different.

On April 28 at 3 am, light contractions woke me up, and it felt surreal that the day was finally here. I even got mentally prepared for a morning birth thinking it would be the same as my son. So, I told my husband to get everything ready, and he connected the water hose to fill up the tub while I concentrated on giving birth.

Well, it was 6 in the afternoon, and still NO BABY!

I was keeping track of my contractions all this time and noticed that they were irregular and slowing down. Eventually, I ditched the tracker app to focus my attention on my body. In hindsight, I believe that keeping track of the contractions was a distraction that prevented me from submitting to the natural birth experience process. I wonder at times if my labor would have been shorter! 😳 There is always a possibility. My prayer is that it will be the case for you!

Within two hours of not tracking the contractions, I saw things picking up again, and by 8 pm, I had progressed to back labor, meaning that the pain was more intense in the lower back and hip area. I also texted my midwife to let her know. At this point, I felt beyond exhausted from the contractions and getting up at 3 am. All I wanted was a nap so bad.

birthing room

The best part about giving birth at home is that you feel more comfortable. I moved around the house, changed positions from sitting to standing as the contractions allowed, and ate lightly whenever I wanted. In addition, I listened to birthing meditation 🧘‍♀️ with headphones and made sure to have a pleasant ambiance in the home. Those things helped to quiet my mind and relax my body. As women go into labor, their body needs relaxation to open up and help push the baby out. So, YES, your body helps you!

I wish more doctors would be mindful of birth as a sacred moment instead of rushing women to give birth on a timeline. We need to empower mothers by offering encouragement instead of fear, a calm environment over an anxious one, and informed consent instead of coercion. I’ve even had family tell me that their babies wouldn’t come out and ended up with an emergency c-section. When I asked them if they were fearful, they nodded in agreement. It makes sense now. Fear causes the body to tense up, which causes more pain, complicates things, and even prolongs labor and delivery.

How many more positive birth experiences would women have if they felt in control and protected?

This picture reminds me of how God is in every detail of our lives if we allow Him. When I was pregnant and praying for my natural birth experience, I envisioned this exact moment in my mind. I could see myself inside the tub with my husband kneeling in front, holding my body, feeling supported and loved. You see, God granted the desires of my heart and compensated my firstborn’s traumatic birth experience by granting me a second, more peaceful, and empowering natural birth experience. I am beyond grateful and want everyone to know about his faithfulness.

You may also like to read: How to write a birth plan.

May he give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed.

Psalm 20:4

it’s showtime

My midwife got to my house about 9 pm, and I was okay with all of this. I remember feeling exhausted but not worried as I was trusting the process. I’m glad she got there during back labor since it felt more intense than frontal contractions. She placed her hands on my lower back and applied firm pressure with her fingertips, making the pain more tolerable. Also, sitting on an exercise ball or yoga ball is super helpful– I don’t know what I would have done without it. I highly recommend you purchase one.

At exactly midnight, I got into the warm tub because I was already feeling the urge to bear down and push. My midwife gave me the green light to go in. But, as oddly as this may sound, at first, the water made me irritable until my body adjusted, and fortunately, it wasn’t long before the baby’s head started to show.

At the crowning moment when babies’ heads come out… fear gripped me! 😩 I feared the pain of tearing, and those intrusive thoughts overwhelmed my mind. My midwife noticed my body cues, and she said, “you’re afraid, but she’s almost here.” So I mustered what little strength I had to inhale and push my baby out. At exactly 12:12 am on April 29, my precious Abigail was born.

New birth

It’s hard to tell in this picture but I’m hunching because the umbilical cord felt somewhat restricted. I didn’t see the cord wrapped around my baby’s neck. However, our midwife quickly untangled the cord twice! She told us to talk to Abigail and blow air to her face so she would let out a cry. Eventually, she did! And we sighed with relief. 😅

Shortly after, I was helped out of the tub and laid on the sofa. I remember feeling weak and lightheaded and receiving medication for mild blood loss and then stitches for perineal tearing. I must add that I gave in to the fear of pain and pushed hard instead of relaxing to allow my body to help me push the baby out.

At this point, I was just glad that baby was born, and we were both doing well. She was in my arms, and we were bonding. After the cord turned white and stopped pulsating, she was removed for vitals and weighing. There was no harsh handling, rubbing, spanking, or washing baby. All these interventions are unnecessary when a baby is just born. Just imagine what babies go through when removed from their home, the womb? Now they have to learn a new environment; I think we must make the transition as easy as possible with a more gentle approach.

While resting, my husband got Abigail all pretty and dressed up and captured this moment in the other room. So, I present to you our sweet strawberry! 🍓 Abigail is growing strong and beautiful by the day. I’m so grateful to be her mom, and I cannot wait to tell her one day about our natural birth experience and what God has done for us.

I learned that birth takes a woman’s deepest fears about herself and shows her strength. I never imagined what I was capable of until this day. My birth pains were nothing compared to my first birth experience; I believe this was because I felt in control. There was no medical intervention, no distractions, only a relaxed, quiet environment exactly as nature intended. Women deserve this sacred space!

“A MIRACLE IS REALLY THE ONLY WAY TO DESCRIBE MOTHERHOOD AND GIVING BIRTH. IT’S UNBELIEVABLE HOW GOD HAS MADE US WOMEN AND BABIES TO ENDURE AND BE ABLE TO DO SO MUCH. A MIRACLE, INDEED. SUCH AN INCREDIBLE BLESSING.”

JENNIE FINCH

I truly hope you found this post helpful. However, if you are undecided about home birth or hospital birth, I recommend you to read the Birth Preparation Guide to get some clarity.

♥ Love & Blessings